Welcome to Birthyourway's Blog. This space is intended to serve as an interactive site for Doula related stuff based in Ottawa and around the globe. The archive links on the right hand margin will help you identify topics of interest to you. Your pictures of real pregnant bodies- stretch marks and all- would be most appreciated as contributions. Share your birth stories, concerns and comments by submitting to

Friday, March 10, 2006

What people never mention

Working in the birthing community, I've come to realize that there are too many things that happen behind closed doors. Sure, birth is very personal, but we could all use a little more truth in our daily lives, like how we come into the world for example, and how we die for that matter. These are the only sure things in life we are all born, and we all die. So why is it that we know so little about either? Here are some untold truths. Please feel free to add yours.

  • when you are visibly pregnant, stranger’s thinks it's okay to touch you in rather private places. Also, be warned of all the unsolicited advise.
  • After giving birth, your genitals will likely look gigantic until after the swelling goes down.
  • you may pass lemon-sized blood clots a few days after birth.
  • The best way to relieve engorged breasts is to have a hot shower or place a warm wet cloth on your chest then breastfeed or pump despite the initial pain.
  • You will look about 5 months pregnant after the delivery.
  • making low guttural sounds is what having a baby sounds like.
  • Every birthing woman has a ritual pattern. Don't fight yours.
  • Birth plans are great, but they are more like a vision/wish list, not a written contract. If your means allot to you, find a trusted levee- headed someone to advocate for you.
  • you might not like your baby right away.
  • All that lovely attention you've been getting goes to the baby once it's born. So enjoy it while it lasts.
  • Babymoons are a lovely way to enter motherhood.
  • Leaving a detailed message like "baby X was born January 1 at 7:00 am weighing 7 pounds 7 ounces. Mom and baby are doing fine, please leave a message we'll call you back when we've had some sleep" then turning the ringer off and actually getting some peace is actually a possibility. That's all they really want to know anyways.
  • When you have guests over for the first while, answer the door in your Pyjamas or housecoat. That gives your guest a visual cue that you are recovering from childbirth and they'll be less likely to ask you for tea.
  • Co sleeping is totally safe (on a firm bed without heavy fluffy blankets and no chance of baby falling out) and it's so helpful for feeding in the night, especially if you are breastfeeding.


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